The Boy in the Moon: by Ian Brown

A very influential time for Ian Brown was when he had visited the L'Arche communities in Montreal and in France. Brown first visited the L'Arche in Montreal. At first, Brown was a bit nervous to visit this community of disabled adults. As he walked into L'Arche Montreal for the first time, Ian said, "I didn't know what they expected of me." (page 188) Ian felt that the community began judging him as soon as he walked in the door, which had created this nervous feeling in him. Nearing the end of Ian's visit to the Montreal L'Arche community, Ian had become less nervous around all of the disabled adults. "Surrounded for the first time in my life by intellectually disabled adults I had only just met, I suddenly realized I didn't feel nervous." (page 190) This shows that Ian Brown eventually felt comfortable in the L'Arche community of Montreal.

Ian Brown then departed from Canada to see the France L'Arche community. Ian said, "I was there to find out if I was letting my son down." (page 196) Ian felt worried for Walker when he thought about sending him to a home such as L'Arche. He did not want to send his son to a community that he did not feel would suit his son and take care of him in the way he would like. Ian thought rather differently about the French community. "All of which was interesting, free spirited, and made me extremely nervous." (page 196) Brown does not like the way the L'Arche France community acts and shares the same beliefs. This made Ian feel increasingly nervous about L'Arche and he did not want Walker to become another one of these people. "I didn't want Walker in a cult." (page 197) This quotation proves that Ian does not feel too strong about L'Arche after visiting France. By the end of both of Ian Brown's trips to L'Arche, he feels that L'Arche is a great community and would be amazing for Walker, despite the nervous feelings he had during the trips.

Throughout my reading of The Boy in the Moon, I have learned about the lifestyle taken with a disabled child. I think that having a disabled child would be a very challenging task, yet it would teach you many things in life. One of the parents of a child with CFC says "...taught me how to live with joy, despite tough circumstances. And to use my time wisely. Not to worry about tomorrow too much, but to enjoy today. She's taught me how to laugh at the little things. She helped me with my vision of life." (page 144) I think it would be amazing to have a child with disabilities change your life so drastically. To be able to live a more fulfilling and happy life because your child has allowed you to see this lifestyle would be spectacular. Yet this parent also mentions that this is despite the tough circumstances taken when raising a child with CFC.

I could easily see raising a child with CFC to be just a difficult task after reading The Boy in the Moon. Ian Brown says, "I would trade him in an instant. I wouldn't trade him for my sake, for our sake, I would trade for his sake. I think Walker has a very, very hard life." (page 80) Although having a child with a disability could be an amazing experience, I agree with what Ian Brown had said about changing Walker's life for Walker's sake. I believe that Walker did not decide to be this way, and if he was able to choose, I do not think he would choose to be severely disabled.

My attitude towards living a life with a disabled child had changed when I read, "if it might not be braver to take my life and take Walker with me..." (page 223) When I had read that Brown was even considering suicide, my attitude had slightly changed. The only reason being that I would never want to really consider suicide because it is almost too much work and stress to raise a child with a disability. Overall, I have learned that life with a profoundly diabled child would be an amazing experience, yet still be an emotional and physical challenge.

1) As a boy, did you ever think about having a disabled child? What were your thoughts and opinions on having a disabled child before Walker?

2) The very last sentence in your book is “We did that together.” (page 288) Do you feel that Walker and you have always done things together, or do you think that you are increasingly doing more things with Walker together?

3) Back when you had to care for Walker every day, did you ever have time to get away and have some personal time rather than watching, calming, feeding, or even thinking about Walker? Was Olga able to provide that support to you and Johanna?